Friday, April 1, 2011

Mom's golden advice


THIS POST WAS NOT TO BE A PUBLIC POST, BUT I FELT THAT MAYBE IT WILL BENEFIT SOMEONE BI'DHNILLAH.

Bismillah hi rahmanir raheem.

I want to share the story of our princess H and the power of dua.

I would like to start by saying Alhumdulillah for healthy and beautiful children Allah has blessed us with. Having healthy complete children is an inconceivable blessing which a lot of people take as granted!

The story of our princess started when we introduced solids to her at around 5 months. Her stool would be bright green and very mucusy. I knew right away that there was something wrong. I did a lot of reading on the internet, asked people, emailed doctors and then concluded that she was sensitive to something she was eating or me (which was going to her through nursing), meaning she might have some sort of allergies. I spoke to an expert and she told me not to worry to much as long as she is not having a some serious signs of allergies, such as asthma, eczema, hives and blood in the stool.

She was waking at night here and there being a little cranky sometimes, but it was all fine until I saw blood one day in her stool, I got really worried about her and started crying! I made lots of dua for her and Alhumdulillah  that was the first and the last time I saw blood in her stool. Alhumdulillah.

I was feeding H everything like normal infant would, except egg (she didn't like it and it would give her a 10 minute rash around her lips and cheek), and avoided milk products, However, her stool still had mucus and would sometimes wake up crying for no apparent reason in the middle of the night. When she reached the mark of toddler-hood (she turned 1) I wanted to start milk with her, because with ALL the house work, homeschooling and nursing I was feeling SO drained by the end of the day! I just wanted her on a bottle at least once a day (milk, not formula). So I started adding milk in her diet here and there to get her use to it, but it was the same thing, crying at night, I would say even worst! So I stopped.

About a month ago someone came to our house and saw her legs and said that she has eczema. She also added saying that her daughter was allergic to ALL sorts of things and she had eczema and asthma. There was also a nurse there who said something around these lines: "Yeah, it looks like eczema but you can't know until you get it tested!". A few week earlier I was testing H to see what she was reacting to and I had pretty much concluded it was cow's milk, because she showed intolerance to "Lactose free milk" as well.


THIS IS THE BEST/MAIN PART!

So the next day I called my mom and told her about how H is allergic to milk I think, but there is no real sign for it and how the ladies at our house had said such and such. (note: I had a very concerned/convinced mommy voice that nothing can be done for her except illuminating milk). My mom listened to me first and then said to me:

Amma: "You are talking as if you have NO trust in the Power of Allah"
(I am thinking in my mind NO, thats not the case! I stayed quite though) she continued saying: "I understand that she cries at night and milk is affecting her, its a well known fact that children's digestive system takes 2 years to completely get use to different foods some children are more sensitive than others. You are saying that Alhumdulillah there is nothing serious that needs immediate care, so inshaAllah when you go back in summer then get her checked. But you need to STOP discussing this with people and start ONLY asking Allah to cure her completely."

Me: "I do, but its been a while she has been going through this."

Amma: "ok, so that means that if you start getting peoples opinions and asking people what to do instead of Allah, it will help change state of her health??"

Me: "No, I know only Allah can give her shifa and Alhumdulillah its not like she is diagnosed to have allergies yet."

Amma: "I would say from now on, just drop this subject (meaning don't talk to anyone about it), erase everything anyone has said to you and put your trust in Allah and make dua for her with FULL conviction that ONLY HE can cure her. I will also make dua for her inshaAllah, I might be going to Makkah I'll make dua for her there too inshaAllah. Give her Zamzam to drink with the intention to cure her." She added a Hadeeth (paraphrased) 'When we rely on people, or turn to people for help then Allah leaves us in the hands of those people.' So, go and ask Allah to cure her and HE is Qadir (All Powerful) on doing that"

Me: (in tears, but realizing that, its true that its only HIM how can help me until I actually go the doctor, or might not even have to do that) "Ok, inshaAllah."

BY ALLAH THE LORD OF THE HEAVENS AND THE EARTH, THE ONLY ONE WORTH OF WORSHIP AND PRAISE, THE MOST KIND, THE EXALTED ONE! Our little girl was AMAZINGLY cured by ALLAH THE AL MIGHTY ALLAH in less then a week! she had been dealing with this for almost 13 months!! Alhumdulillah for the past 2 weeks she has been drinking a bottle of cow's milk in the evening and she sleeps like a baby throughout the night (just gets up for water or nursing and goes right back to sleep) no endless tears of pain!

Lessons I got from this:
  1. ONLY Allah can helps us, not that I didn't know that but the conviction level needs to be stronger. We unknowingly start expecting people to help us when we start sharing our problems and matters with them. I was  asking/talking to different people about her state of health, WHY? To get them to give me a convincing answer/solution. I was not intentionally doing that... I should have ONLY turned to Allah from the start. 
  2. Listening to our parents even when we think they are wrong (as long as they are not telling you to commit shirk or do Haram) can be in benefit for us because Allah will be pleased with you. (At first I felt like, my mom's not understanding, but when she said the Hadeeth, I said to myself YOU are not understanding!)
  3. Nothing in our life happens without a purpose. The purpose behind this in m eyes was the fact that I was exclusively able to nurse H for more then a year. We all know the countless benefits of nursing.
  4. The power of the parents dua! It saddens me to even think of the day when the shade/blessings/barakah/duas of our parents will end upon their death.
  5. I kept thinking about what my mom said and remembered this aayah from suratul Al-'Isra 11 "And man supplicates for evil as he supplicates for good, and man is ever hasty." This ayah made me think so much, for as to maybe I was asking for shar (evil) unknowingly when I was putting my issue in-front of people who really couldn't help me! All, most of them would say was "Yeah she is allergic, our this is the way the allergies start and then they get worst! someone even said stop the dairy right away or she could die (me: WHAT!?? imagine someone telling you that about your child...wouldn't you want to take precaution if that matter could cause them harm). Whatever these people were saying was maybe getting accepted which I was not aware of. I was hasting for a solution and turning to people was not the right way to go about it...but to me it seemed wrongfully right! 
  6. How blessed I am to have a wonderful mom like her!! I pray that Allah makes us sadaqah jariyah for them. rabbir ham huma kama rabbayani saghira'. Ameen


Words for my mama!

Nothing like a mother 
who reminds you of Allah when you are falling apart,
who commands you to be patient when things are getting hard,
who loves you even when you don't listen to her (we all do that one time or another),
who reminds you to join kinship,
who reminds you that your husband's Jannah is not you, its his mother!
who reminds you to leave this Duniya because she wasted her youth on it and it didn't benefit nothin'
who reminds you of ALL the blessings Allah has given you, so you can be grateful to Allah
who reminds you that you can do it when you feel like you cannot.
who teaches you to overlook the shortcomings of other and look at the good of others,
who reminds you (repeatedly) that your Jannah is in the obedience to your husband,
who reminds you to better yourseslf as a wife and a mother.
who reminds you of things Allah has protected you from.
and most of ALL 
who reminds you of ALLAH when you need HIM the most!!

I love my mother!

3 comments:

  1. very beautiful.... this was extremely touching it made me cry.... jazak'allah khayr for the post sister.

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  2. Wa eyak! I hope you benefitted from it inshaAllah!

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  3. Nice blog very inspiring.

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